Why is that if a guy wears jeans that fit, a nice sweater and tie he has to be gay?
Just because I like to look neat and put together doesn't mean anything except that I like to look neat. In retrospect, it goes back to my days as a young lad in Detroit.
My mother always said " you have to be neat and clean cause people will think as parent's we don't care about you ". I can understand that. I don't want to make my mother look bad. Now my father was a different story...
My father was a real sharp dresser and he loved clothes. Every now and then he would let me get a peek at
his fitted silk shirts and shark skin suits. My father was really into his appearance and he forced those ideals on me. So much that we weren't allowed to get dirty.
I remember one day my sister and I were at a softball game my dad was playing in. We sat near the parking lot playing with ants in a puddle of muddy water. When the game was over my father saw the mud on our hands and legs and he blew a gasket! During the ride home he asked us why we got dirty, why did we think it was ok to get dirty, and how were we going to fix it? Ok people, at six years old I don't know the right answer but the best possible answer is to say sorry and take a bath right?
Wrong! Wrong!
So we get home and he tells us that we have to get cleaned up and wait for him in the room. While we get cleaned and changed, this MOFO goes out in the yard and picks 2 switches! Now my dad was a master at mind games. He knew our bedroom faced the back and side yard. We could see and hear him cutting the switches. Instead of us getting the whippin' right then, he let's us sit there for what seemed like an hour.
My sister and I were shook!
Finally, this joker comes in and beats the living fecal matter out of us and tells us if we ever get dirty again it's gonna be worse next time!
BOOM! Scarred for life...
I can't remember the last time I got dirty. To this day I don't do much of anything that will get me dirty. I can wear an all white linen suit and white suede bucs in a ketchup factory and come out pristine clean!
All that to say, I'm not gay I'm just scared!
